Chuck E. Cheese Throw Down

On Sunday while you were at brunch mainlining mimosas and ignoring your racist uncle (or as I like to call it…church), a group of dignified individuals got into the brawl of the century at a Chuck E. Cheese in Manchester Connecticut. A family was in the midst of celebrating a child’s birthday when all hell broke loose on and around the carousel. The fight was believed to have been started when a couple strangers approached the area and two women bumped into each other.

Before I continue I’d like to take a second and mention that you’re not allowed into the establishment without a child. So either A) Security said ‘IDGAF’ and let Jesus take the wheel or B) Jesus drove straight into a ditch when he made these people parents.

The footage of the fight did not last the duration because the person filming probably ran out of pizza and went to get more to enjoy the show or they decided to jump in. Either way, I get it. And I respect it, girl. The fight itself is said to have involved a total of 12 human adults and two lesser humans (also known as children, but whatever).

The footage of the whole thing can be found here.

If the camera would have panned over a little more we would have been able to see their kids:

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World Star count: 19

That woman in the blue shirt was determined. Thankfully that booth was there or else getting to where she shouldn’t have been would have been a lot easier. Something tells me the location of the fight was chosen because the carousel follows the same path they all take when they play ring-around-the-parenthood.

The people involved in the fight fled the scene before police arrived. Staff members called the authorities as soon as the fight broke out, but apparently the cops “took some time” to get there. You would think they would enter the situation with a little more urgency. Knowing this, I decided to look up the location of the Chuck E. Cheese and this is what I found:

Screenshot 2016-02-24 19.30.45

mindy-kaling-donut

 

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